Reumers

Leadership Lessons from Dr. Earl Reum...

Sunday, June 05, 2005

The Invisible Kid

[An open letter from the "Invisible Kid" to graduating seniors]

To the Graduating Students of the Science of Leadership Class,

I’ve wanted to write this for a long time but never seemed to have the right words. I am a “nobody.” Some people might think of me as an Invisible Kid. I have never thought of myself as a “leader.” I know who the leaders are in my school. I know all of the “popular” kids. I even have lunch with them once in a great while when I’m invited to join their table.

Sometimes people call us “nobodies” the silent majority. We just sit back and let everyone else make decisions for us. It’s not that we don’t want to get involved. We just don’t know how to get involved. We timidly raise our hand in class to volunteer to help on a special project, but we usually get passed over for someone who is more of a “leader” type. But sometimes we do get picked! I cannot tell you how special that makes us feel. We don’t get picked very often, but when we do, we’re supposed to feel privileged... and we generally do.

When we get the courage enough to actually participate in an activity, we kind of feel out of place and uncomfortable. Those who do try to make us feel more at ease and human-like will forever have our deepest thanks.

I guess I don’t mind being a nobody. I stay out of the way of the popular kids so they don’t have a chance to make fun of me. I’ve never been elected to anything. I’m not a trouble-maker in class, and I even get pretty good grades. I’m only special to me and to those few who are close to me. The spotlight never shines on me - I can only watch it glimmer from afar.

I want you to know that even though I’m a nobody, I have important things that I want to tell everyone. I really do want to share my hopes, my dreams, and my special talents with anyone who is willing to receive what I so desperately want to share.

I hope that by telling you this you will take a moment to stop and think about us nobodies. I think that there are lots of nobodies in the world. Maybe the two boys who killed the students and teacher at Columbine High School thought of themselves as nobodies when they were younger. Maybe they didn’t feel like they belonged to anything. I think they probably felt alone, not loved, and certainly not needed. Maybe that’s why they made up that gang and wore black trench coats and wrote poems about hate and death. Maybe that was their way of trying to reach out and belong to something. I don’t know why they did those terrible things, but I know that the sadness in my heart has caused me to take another look at my life.

That’s why I don’t want to be a nobody any more. Last night I made a promise to myself and my family to think of myself as a “somebody,” even if it makes me feel uncomfortable. I am going to raise my hand more. I am going to volunteer more. I am going to share my hopes, my dreams, and the things that make me special with anyone who will listen... even if it make me feel embarrassed. Please help me to be a somebody by continuing to invite me to be on your team, to sit at your lunch table, to get more involved in school activities. I might say “no,” but please keep asking. Someday I will have the courage to say “yes.” You can make a difference in my life.

The Invisible Kid